4 Things Only Women Who Are Just Out From a Long-Term Relationship Understand

You’ve spent years of your life with the person, talked about marriage and kids, and perhaps have started a joint bank account. Your family and friends have come to address you two as one and always ask where the other is if you’re not seen together.


Then, for whatever reason, you break up. All of a sudden, the things you share and do together, even being asked why you’re alone, sounds and feels odd to you. For the first time, after so many years, you’re on your own again. Have you been through this situation? Then we bet you could relate to these:

1. The weekends seem to stretch forever. Where once you’ve reserved Saturdays and Sundays for movies and dinner dates with your partner, now you can watch videos and have dinner by yourself, which can be good or not depending on which memories of your recently-ended relationship you dwell on. Now, your weekends are free, so you try to fill in the gap as much as possible. Late-night dinner date with girlfriends? You got it! Out-of-town trip? You’re all packed up!

2. Your future is suddenly uncertain. Even though you haven’t yet planned your future prior the breakup, you did know that your ex was going to be a significant part of it. Now that he’s out of the picture, you probably feel clueless of what your future will be. Sure, the breakup may have opened the door better opportunities— furthering your studies, transferring to a better company in another city, even migrating abroad—but which one do you pursue?


3. You’ve forgotten how to play the dating game. Once you feel like seeing other people again, you then realize that you’re now clueless as to how to go about it. Since you’ve been idle for such a long time, you no longer know what the rules are when dating. How do you say goodbye after a date? Do you simply wave goodbye, kiss him on the cheek…or shake his hand? And for the record, how will you know whether a guy is asking you on a date or simply wants to hang out with you?

4. You have a “Better Off Without You” playlist. All women who have gone through a terrible break up are guilty of this. Perhaps, you have Sam Smith, Taylor Swift and Adele on repeat? You listen to their songs while driving to work, in the office, on your way home, and maybe until you go to sleep. They are your soundtrack as you wonder what happened, what went wrong, and why things ended the way they did. And while it terribly hurts to hear the last eight years of your supposedly happy-ever-after relationship in a chart-topping song, you can’t help but repeatedly listen to it anyway.

Ending a long-term relationship sure is a horrible experience, and getting through it is an agonizing journey. While it takes time to heal the wounds and pull your life back into shape, it’s comforting to know that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger overtime.


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